Today is a love story. No, not the romantic rip-your-clothes-off lustful type of love, but instead the laugh your face off over martinis and share stories about the rip-your-clothes-off kind of love. Her name is Gillian and we met through Instagram – the online dating portal for female friendships. If you’ve ever met someone online you know there’s a process. For those who haven’t, let me lead the way.
Step 1: Check out your mutual connections. Oftentimes, dating websites will inform you of mutual friends allowing for some automatic trust. Although IG isn’t that forthcoming, the principle still applies. If you are interested in Stacy and Stacy follows Sarah as well, good chance you and Stacy have some things in common.
Step 2: Don’t act too desperate. Play it cool. You want to make sure you ease into these things or you can come of as needy. When you hop over to Stacy’s page, like three or four pictures, commenting on one of them to bring attention to yourself. If you mess this step up, the friendship may die before it even begins.
Step 3: Await interest from your IG crush. Most of the time your crush will notice your attention to their page and return the interest by liking several of your photos. Once she has noticed you, it’s time to make a move.
Step 4: Follow. I know, vulnerability is scary, but hopefully the reward is worth it. Does she like my page? Am I out of her league? Do I post what I eat too much? Many times, your crush will follow you back. However, there are times when it doesn’t go as planned. In these moments, remind yourself that it’s not personal and that you are beautiful, take good photos and are worthy of mutual love.
Step 5: Spend several weeks connecting. Comment on photos, laugh at their jokes and pay attention to their blog. Be patient as a true connection will not happen overnight. It will take some time.
Step 6: Ask for a date. Your hard work has paid off and it’s time to compose a short and simple direct message asking for a date. Remember this is date one. Go simple, you will have many more to come.
Back to Gillian. I’m happy to announce that the two of us have maintained our attraction to each other and continue to recreate our first date on a regular basis. Unfortunately in the last several weeks, Gillian has been diagnosed with breast cancer and opted for a double mastectomy. You can see her campaign here. If you can help her out, please do.
As for me, I was never really good at “the game” and no longer need Match or Tinder. So I’m spending my efforts on Instagram friending too soon and coming on too strong, sending most of my crushes running the other direction.
Leopard Print Scarf – ARC Thrift – $2 (also here)
Yuki Shirt – ARC Thrift – $2
Carmen Marc Valvo Silk Skirt – Mountain Thrift – $1
La Spiga Shoes – Goodwill – $3.50